The beatles all Come Together

The beatles, Coming Together and the ultimate circle jerk

Circle Jerk definition:
1. A circle jerk is a sexual practice in which a group of men or boys form a circle and masturbate themselves or each other.
2. A boring or time-wasting meeting or other event
3. (beatles) Worthless or oversimplified ideas; drivel: intellectual pap

What do you get when you combine idiotic lyrics sung without a hint of melody over a turgid, plodding beat? If you said one of the dumbest songs ever recorded and one of the most revered rock anthems of the beatles career, give yourself a pat on the back.

Come Together also happens to be one of the most covered songs of all time, and the second most covered beatles song after ‘Yesterday.’ Every year bands continue to cash in on it’s easily recognized Oompa Loompa stoner groove. It’s become a staple of the live music scene. If you want to make it in a bar band playing lame covers to a room full of disinterested drunks you really need to learn this this cursed monkey paw of a song, alongside of Mustang Sally and Black Magic Woman.

They Muddied Water

Many fans of the FF point to this song as proof of the beatles originality. It stands as confirmation that not only did this band revolutionize rock music by singing about holding hands, they also saved it by showing the world how to rock hard. According to these experts, when this song hit the airwaves nothing came close to matching the rawness or groove of this inspired song.

It might come as a shock to these fans that when this song came out rock music did not need to be saved by a group of semi-mystical, costume clad, success bloated cream puffs. It needed to be saved from them! Rock music was doing fine in spite of the beatles. Just like this song!

The beatles – Come Together :

Audio clip: Adobe Flash Player (version 9 or above) is required to play this audio clip. Download the latest version here. You also need to have JavaScript enabled in your browser.

Chuck Berry – You Can’t Catch Me (1956):

Audio clip: Adobe Flash Player (version 9 or above) is required to play this audio clip. Download the latest version here. You also need to have JavaScript enabled in your browser.

The Beatleberry combo (29 calories):

Audio clip: Adobe Flash Player (version 9 or above) is required to play this audio clip. Download the latest version here. You also need to have JavaScript enabled in your browser.

The beats obviously didn’t want to ruin their album with a track by Chuck Berry, it would only serve to highlight how much their songwriting skills had deteriorated by this point in their career. Instead they did the next best thing, they renamed it.

McCartney thought they should slow the song down or something because:

I pointed out to him that it was very similar to Chuck Berry’s You Can’t Catch Me. John acknowledged it was rather close to it so I said, ‘Well, anything you can do to get away from that.’

Lennon:

Come Together is me, writing obscurely around an old Chuck Berry thing. I left the line in ‘Here comes old flat-top.’

As you can see, its just a simple misunderstanding reminiscent of an earlier misunderstanding with Chuck Berry. The seminal beatle classic ‘I saw here standing there’ was written by McCartney and released in 1963, receiving massive critical and commercial success. Compare if you will:

The FF – I saw here standing there:

Audio clip: Adobe Flash Player (version 9 or above) is required to play this audio clip. Download the latest version here. You also need to have JavaScript enabled in your browser.

Chuck Berry -Talkin’ about you (1961 – Take special note of the bassline):

Audio clip: Adobe Flash Player (version 9 or above) is required to play this audio clip. Download the latest version here. You also need to have JavaScript enabled in your browser.

They just do what they please

To derail this article a little further, here’s a small series of coincidences for your listening pleasure.

The beatles – I Feel Fine (1964)

Audio clip: Adobe Flash Player (version 9 or above) is required to play this audio clip. Download the latest version here. You also need to have JavaScript enabled in your browser.

Bobby Parker – Watch Your step (1961)

Audio clip: Adobe Flash Player (version 9 or above) is required to play this audio clip. Download the latest version here. You also need to have JavaScript enabled in your browser.

Bobby Parker on the beatles

The beatles – Lady Madonna (1968)

Audio clip: Adobe Flash Player (version 9 or above) is required to play this audio clip. Download the latest version here. You also need to have JavaScript enabled in your browser.

Humphrey Lyttelton – Bad Penny Blues (1956)

Audio clip: Adobe Flash Player (version 9 or above) is required to play this audio clip. Download the latest version here. You also need to have JavaScript enabled in your browser.

Don’t think of it as stealing, think of it as a series of crazy misunderstandings.

They shill Coca-Cola

This song was wisely banned by the BBC after it’s release. Unfortunately they banned it for the wrong reason: product placement, the cornerstone of the beatles empire. It’s somehow alright to have Corn Flakes forced into your ears, but Coca-Cola rubbed the tea and crumpets engorged censors the wrong way.

Incidentally, this was the second unsuccessful attempt by the beatles to sell Coca Cola. You may remember their other campaign from the same time period:

He Got Monkey Paw

This song continues to grow stronger every year, as though it was blasted by gamma radiation on the way to the airwaves. It should be required to have the listener sign a waiver before being allowed to listen to it, after being read the following warning: “This little ditty had a spell put on it by an old Fakir. He wanted to show how bad music begets bad music and grows exponentially. Those who intentionally listened did so to their sorrow.”

Lets end this on a positive note. Here’s a clip of the MC5 playing their original song Come Together in 1969.
It has nothing to do with the beatles, and a lot to do with the title.

sources:

http://www.beatlesbible.com/songs/come-together/2/

http://beatleswiki.org/wiki/Come_Together

Incoming search terms:

Stumble It!

(1 votes, average: 5.00 out of 5)

Loading ...

November 4th, 2011

9 Responses to “The beatles all Come Together”

Stelth Says:
November 17th, 2011 at 5:37 pm
Excellent post DAS! More evidence of the scumbaggery in which the beatles built their fraudulent careers. Keep up the good work!
Danny Says:
November 17th, 2011 at 7:23 pm
Great Post! This was one of the best. I like these really factual arguments for why the beatles’ music totally sucks, although I understand why you don’t like to write them. The worst part of proving how awful the beatles are is having to listen to it on purpose.

The main riff from ‘Moby Dick’ is inspired by ‘Watch You Step’, whereas ‘I Feel Fine’ is a lazy, blatant rip-off. Just more empirical evidence to support the argument that Led Zeppelin and the beatles are on opposite ends of the musical spectrum, with the beatles occupying the Unbearably Sucky side, and Zep dominating the Unmitigated Awesome side
Danny Says:
November 17th, 2011 at 7:24 pm
EDIT
listen to *them* on purpose
Das Says:
November 18th, 2011 at 7:56 am
Thanks, it was more painful than you can imagine!

The one thing I’ve never been able to reconcile about Zeppelin is how they rarely credited the artists they sampled from. I’ve always thought it was cool to hear echoes of Howlin Wolf or Willie Dixon, or to discover where the riff for ‘Moby Dick’ came from.

They freely used what they liked and made something new and exciting with it. But they had the money to pay for royalties, so I’ve always wondered why not give credit where credit is due?
Danny Says:
November 21st, 2011 at 4:08 pm
That’s a common criticism of the band, and I have several theories about why they were careless in giving credit to the artists that inspired them.

Page and Plant were both enormously in love with the blues, much more than their British rock peers, and especially more than the beatles, who treated the genre as a cheap gimmick that they could mine for the occasional riff or lyric. The moment that cemented the decision to form Led Zeppelin came when Jimmy Page invited Robert Plant over to his house to check out his record collection, and Robert Plant already knew and could sing all the obscure Delta bluesmen that Page worshipped.
The Zep founders had an encyclopedic knowledge of the blues before the band was ever founded, and I think that to them when they covered “You Shook Me” or “I Can’t Quit You Baby” it was very obvious what they were doing. So much that they didn’t think it necessary to credit Willie Dixon as the original artist. I admit this is not an entirely good reason, but a lot more generous than the “greedy dishonest rock star” accusation that the Zep detracters drag out so often.

Another factor is that the Zep versions are usually entirely reworked and share little similarities with the original. Compare their “When the Levee Breaks” with Memphis Minnie’s. Both great songs, but as different musically as night and day (although they actually gave her credit on that one). The same with “In My Time of Dying”, “Nobody’s Fault But Mine”, “Whole Lotta Love”, “Travelling Riverside Blues”, etc. The great similarity they share with the original blues staples is the lyrics, and that brings us to the next point.
The era of Blues that Zeppelin so frequently borrowed from was a communal genre more akin to folk music than pop music. Artist borrowed from each other all the time without considering it plagiarism or dishonest. Credit wasn’t important and copyright laws unheard of. Zep gets a lot of flak for stealing Robert Johnson’s “Squeeze my lemon” line, but Robert Johnson didn’t come up with it either. Lyrics about Killing Floors, Backdoor Men, Hoochie Coochie Men,Sugar Mamas and all manner of unfaithful women appear over and over again by all sorts of Delta and electric blues artists. Such was the blues.

It’s also important to note that whenever Led Zeppelin was sued for royalties they quickly settled out of court. They never denied their influences. Compare this to the “Ice, Ice Baby” fiasco, or George Harrison’s “My Sweet Lord” reaction.

Also, Led Zeppelin did give credit on occasion. There is the above-mentioned “When the Levee Breaks.” There is also a funny anecdote about “Boogie with Stu,” from Physical Graffiti. They tried to give Ritchie Valens’ mother credit because they borrowed lyrics from one of her son’s songs, but she tried to sue them for the whole song instead. Wikipedia has a brief summary of the event, but it’s missing Robert Plant’s really hilarious version of the story.

In conclusion, the members of Zep were not perfect, but for me they will always be the greatest band of all time, and even that is an understatement. They contributed far more than they took from the genre that inspired them.
Neil Says:
March 10th, 2012 at 1:10 pm
The Beatles were and always will be the greatest band ever..and the ferry cross the Mersey they played on is rotting at the Thames barrier – a travesty
DogShit Says:
March 11th, 2012 at 10:42 am
OK, put the bong and hypodermic needles down slowly, and walk away.
razónenlanada Says:
April 20th, 2012 at 11:38 pm
Son unos reverendos hijos de mil puta, no los beatles, ustedes, pedazos de mierdas
DogShit Says:
April 20th, 2012 at 11:54 pm
Si usted puede leer en castellano, hablar y escribir en Inglés, maricón.