Free Beatles Christmas Cards 2012

Yikes, this year flew by faster than a beatle condom on Ebay. We would like to issue an official apology to all our friends for the pathetic number of updates this past year. This is not from a shortage of material, we’ve suffered through the same quantity of tin eared sludge scraped from the bowels of the beatle septic tank as any other year.

Every once in a while you need to step back and gain a fresh perspective. We’ve tried to plug our noses and forget the stench beatlemania has soured the world with for over forty years, but to no avail. The beatles are the Exxon Valdez of the music industry, and the damage and destruction their tuneless crude has caused to the musical environment will take several months longer to correct than we first imagined. This coming year we vow to stay atop the Deepwater Horizon of beatlemart, the BP of pop, and expose it’s crimes for all to hear (or just turn on the radio and you’ll hear it for yourself).

With that said,

Welcome to the sixth annual Suck My Beatles Free beatles Christmas Cards spectacular!

Once again we’ve tried to leave out the holiday messages so you can give out these beautiful cards all year round! We like to think of it as ‘paying it forward’ as opposed to beatlemarts ‘pay us more, muthafucka.’

To print these cards try holding down Ctrl P, Command P on the Mac, or ask your mom for help if you are a beatle fan.

NEVERMIND the beatles


hair peace, hair piece


wish the beatles would disappear for christmas


the beatles are middle of the road

the beatles blow


the beatles suck, breastfeeding

revolver is revolting

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13 thoughts on “Free Beatles Christmas Cards 2012

  1. DogShit

    I hope you both got tied up during the holidays and forced to watch beatles movies and cartoons, and the white album played on volume level 1 in the background while you tried to sleep, and you couldn’t find the source. HA!

  2. DogShit

    YEH, I think I’d rather spend my holidays in County Jail. But with my luck they would have in cell music piped in and every third songs would be the fag…..I mean fabs.

  3. uncle touched me funny

    that awkward moment when you realize if you hate the beatles so much, why do you know so much about them? :O XD

  4. DogShit

    When you want to destroy your enemy, you learn everything about them that you can to figure out how to destroy them. Don’t you understand the art of war, and I’m talking about real war? Same goes here. Read your history.

  5. Stelth

    This news is 5 years old but I think it beautifully illustrates the horrible musical taste Paul McCartney has:
    From Wikipedia:
    In December 2008, former Beatle Sir Paul McCartney was asked by a session musician which bands he enjoys in the current music scene. The response was the Barenaked Ladies: “Their harmonies are right on. They could outsing us any day of the week. I don’t think John and myself ever had the sort of range they do.” McCartney added that he would not mind recording with the band in the future.[61]

  6. Tingle

    Era jävla kuksugare, ni kan bara gå och äta schamponerade sälfittor.
    Era mammor går för en hundring.
    Och fuck off and die, du är för ful för mig och din morsa går för en hundring, säger jag rakt i ditt face…

  7. Zakary Allen Drudle

    Now from the news from all of you for the Beatles fans I know that the Beatles is not so bad and what I mean Paul john. Gorege and Ringo is my favorite and your saying the Beatles is good and all of the music is still living and including Gorege Harrison’s songs and I love it , why your saying don’t like the Beatles ? Give me a reason .